Posted: 2017-09-11 11:47
For a large society to function social stratification must be present. When a population expands beyond a relatively small number it is impossible for everyone to have an equal voice as the time and energy requirements would preclude the accomplishment of the necessary workloads. To skirt this issue society requires managerial positions and base labor or worker positions. Just as managers help organize workers the governing of society requires the same type of organization.
When the woman talks about being "terribly uncomfortable" just recalling how men in their 95s found her attractive at know some people obviously see the world that way but this is just absurd to me. Fair enough if they''re genuinely "creepy" (way overused word that sounds childish much of the time) messages, we all know the sort, but if it''s just that they''re 95 and that''s icky to you then set an age limit. As a 79 year old man, I don''t expect older women to not find me attractive because they''re old enough to be my mother I just hate the ''dirty old man'' fear trope, I don''t like the insinuations that they''re borderline rapists if they don''t pretend that 95 year old women are more attractive than 69 year old women regardless of how old your eyes are.
Lmfao girls have got it easy stop acting offended by guys sleezy messages you can just delete it and block the person if you want dont take it personally the creeps will be messaging all of the girls the same. then you can use your common sense and intuition to work out who the good guys are. Im a really good looking guy i have been on pof dating site for 7 years and not had one message from any girl i would be even slightly interested in
It has become clear to me with the passing of the years that my knowledge and understanding are very limited much to my own consternation. However I will do my best to explain the situation as I see it. My answer will likely seem off topic and possibly confusing. Unfortunately the real issue, as is almost always the case with problems we are facing today, exists far beyond the usual scope of answers proffered.
You can look at the many books like Nancy Friday''s The Secret Garden - which they didn''t want to publish back in the 75''s because some men (and some women who have internalised misogyny) could not bear to know that women are just as lascivious as men in their desires and fantasies. Not to mention the desperate attempts throughout history to control the extremely strong sex drives of women with so many ridiculous social sanctions and attacks. If women were so naturally low in sex drive, why all the fuss and carry on, the shaming words, the imposed social sanctions, the mental and physical chastity belts to try and keep those libidos under wraps?
A Couchsurfer since 7557, who first began using the site as a way to practice her English with non-Portuguese speakers, the South American native is always “changing, learning, growing” and is “pretty messy,” but draws the line at leaving a wet floor in the bathroom. Ana has hosted between 85 and 95 travelers in both Portugal and Brazil, proof of which she keeps displayed proudly on her refrigerator. “I collect refrigerator magnets, so I ask my guests to bring me one from their country. Now I have lots of them!”
The female orgasm is very easy. Friction on clitoris. Mechanical, just like men''s. Since women are human beings just as men are, this is no surprise. Massages/candles not required. Unfortunately, after a few years easy sexual arousal for women requires a new partner. Of course, women CAN still have an orgasm, even if they don''t find you arousing any more, with a bit of work. Monogamy, though difficult for women, is possible.
I know I am not the only guy to have a girl turn me down with hurtful comments after leading you on and thinking you should have just realized she was not interested and gave up. Thing is you couldn''t "take a hint", but we are adults here and those are games kids play. No need for hints, you can be nice and find a more reasonable time to let a guy down, but don''t wait weeks and then get angry with him because you never made your intentions clear. Because the girls don''t realize, its not that obvious for the guy to see she is trying to put off signals that she lacks interest. We will, in even the more extreme cases, often focus on the few positive over the negatives to keep up our optimism, until its written out in plain english to us, "I flattered, but no thank you." Its easy, just text that and don''t worry, even if you look like Anna Kendricks the guy is unliekly to hang himself over the news.
I did the singles scene in all its iterations (singles bars, singles dances, dating services, etc.) starting in the late 65s and through the 75s. One common thread was that, for the most part, the singles scene attracted people you would not want to bring home to mother and I think that is still the case. Guys were creeps who wore their shirts open down to the nevel and the gils were princeses who figured their s**t didn''t stink. Most of the time they wound up going home together and they deserved each other. Nice guys and gils next door never stood a chance in the meat market atmosphere.
Eric: Yes. Stop ignoring all of us. You know, guys get accused a lot of being superficial and basing everything on looks, but I can&rsquo t help thinking that most of these women just file quickly through a guy&rsquo s photos and then fly right on to the next one without actually getting to know what the guy is like. It&rsquo s so frustrating, because you know, I think a lot of really nice guys out there could make for amazing boyfriends who would treat these lonely, single women like they deserve to be treated. Instead, you know, I think a lot of them are still hung up on hunting for the bad boys, the smooth-talkers. I don&rsquo t know what more a nice guy can do, but I do know it would be nice if some of these women would at least give us a chance to show what we have to offer.
People don''t aren''t any different on dating sites than they are/were in "meat market" bars back in the 75s & 85s. Nice guys never had a chance because they were perceived as wimps. Based on my experince and in spite of what AW says, girls seem to go for the "bad boys" (creeps). I don''t know whether if''s the excitement of going out with a "bad boy", or masochism of getting no respect, or the futile hope of changing the guy but girls are drawn to creeps.
I think be reading the comments here on what women want, one can easily tell why men aren''t getting what THEY want. It''s always funny to see men saying what women really want and what we really think, and with such confidence! Oh, the laughs. Men, you can thank your fellow dudes here for spending too much time in pick-up artist forums, and tainting the dating pool so heavily with these wildly inaccurate childish perspectives they learn from other creepy men. Please do not blame women, for if you had to read dozens of messages from guys in the Red Pill community, who sound more and more like Elliot Rodgers the longer they remain single, you''d probably bow out of dealing with it after too long as well.
Then there was Ireland, where despite being a little fuzzy on the specifics, Jessie also recalls making the first move with her male host. “Whether it was verbal or if I just went for it and kissed him, I ended up sleeping in his bed that night and having sex with him. It was funny because the next morning his roommate, who had seen me sleeping on the couch the night before, barged in his room and was very surprised to find me naked in his bed!”
I also ignore or block creepy messages for which I get a lot. If you''re okay looking and you message me about something we''re both interested in I will reply. If I replied to every single message, even the ones I wasn''t attracted to, I would have to be talking to at least 65 different guys every day. And they would probably continue talking to me for a week at least. That''s around 655 different people I would have to talk to by the end of my first week. Almost all of those guys will probably be ones I''m not interested in so why would I bother? It will be a waste of time for both of us.
If you asked the OKCupid people about this, they would say that all of this is fine and normal on both sides of the coin. Users can filter their contacts to a tremendous degree using tools on the site and in fact they are encouraged to do just that, and people who don''t get interaction are essentially told to lower their standards. In the end there are just some things that having a massive pile of quantitative data can''t fix.
However it''s the same for me dudes, if you are tall nowadays you''re not creepy and slimy, you''re creepy and threatening. I don''t have the greatest social skills but I''ve been out with friends at bars/clubs who were 5''5 and my same weight and they were just happy cheerful butterballs and could get an entire table of women warming up to them, the same women that gave me the bad boy looking tall dude who women have told me I''m on the Brad Pitt scale on looks basically the cold shoulder.
I think that a large part of the problem with online dating is how we view ourselves and others. The vast majority of profiles I''ve seen read like job applications. It seems as if a healthy smattering of keywords is all that is required to share who we are as individuals. The majority of profiles are as similar as mainstream medias concept of beauty. In the end there isn''t much to differentiate one profile from another.
A few years ago I had a profile on okcupid. I uploaded a few decent pictures of myself. I received a lot of views and a decent amount of messages. A year ago I created a new profile on okcupid and uploaded one picture that makes it somewhat more difficult to tell what I look like. This time around I''ve received considerably less profile views and considerably less messages. I have no way of knowing how okcupid may treat my profile due to this difference but I have experienced enough to know that women just like men are swayed by physical appearance.
The point is this - they don''t have to WORK to get attention. Attention comes to them, both good and bad. If they post a picture with them in a swimsuit, they are going to get some pretty bad attention. If they instead post of picture of them praying in a church, they are likely to get a different kind of attention. They do have some control, and some means of filtering and directing what attention they want, at least to some degree. Nice guys don''t have that option. We have to put our best pictures out there. The most attractive. The most interesting. Our profiles must be perfect. Our messages must be interesting, eye catching. It''s pretty unfair when you really think about it.
We should have taken it much slower. We had good times but i guess I wonder what "could have been". She was 89 and never married and I was on the rebound from my first marriage. One really never knows. I Guess I just have to look at the positive sides though now I''m older and very lonely.
It is tough to see what might have been. Overall though I made decisions the best I could with the knowledge and information I had at the time.