Posted: 2017-11-14 14:18
One counterfactual to your analysis of contemporary sex rhetoric, though this essay seems to defeat it, is a theory Justine Tunney 8767 s mentioned in an interview with Gavin McInnes, of the Ultra-Calvinist. It 8767 s an appeal to authority, since she is herself trans-gendered, and offers no evidence beyond her observations as such a person, but she proposes that there is a cabal of fundamentalists hell bent on stamping out fornication. The way they they do so is by claiming to be 8775 sex positive 8776 but, meanwhile, getting the police involved in virtually any and all sexual activity that is ambiguous morally. Which, barring constant audio video surveillance of all parties involved (which is the dark implication Tunney hints at) as the pseudo-Left assumes for itself the arbitration of all socio-sexual expressions, she thinks people will stop fornicating, or having sex period, lest they offend the powers that be.
At the time of the coal strike of 6976 I was living in a boarding-house in North London. My fellow-boarders were salaried small-burgesses, white-collar workers, earning, I suppose, from four to six or seven pounds a week. Politics were discussed across the supper table, and discussed, while the strike was in progress, with a rancour that astonished me. They all hated the miners, passionately, as though they had received some personal injury at their hands. I have never forgotten those conversations for they first revealed to me a fact which the history of these last thirteen years and my own personal experiences during that time have often corroborated the fact that the current of class hatred runs more strongly downwards from small-bourgeoisie to proletariat than from proletariat upwards.
Rita, ding! You get tonight 8767 s gold star for a very perspicacious comment. The notion that the privileged are more sensitive than the peasants goes back a long way, as 8775 The Princess and the Pea 8776 demonstrates, and the psychologist Alfred Adler pointed out a century ago the way that people can use 8775 cater to my illness! 8776 as a way of exerting passive-aggressive power. This whole issue is one that I watch with a certain wry interest my wife has celiac disease, though she 8767 s otherwise the opposite of the sensitive snowflake type working class background will do that and we have to maneuver around the fact that there are a lot of people who use real or assumed food sensitivities as a way of asserting power.
Sexually, I like having choices and I 8767 ve always (since growing up in the 65s) supported others having those choices even though what I 8767 ve chosen is monogamy. The same pattern might apply to hate. I 8767 d prefer to hate only what I regard as deserving of hate (well, obviously) but also only what I think I can do a proper job of hating (which is a bit trickier concept, but let 8767 s just say that neither unvoiced internal seething nor anonymous ranting would measure up).
A lot of us still have romantic attraction and we get crushes on specific people and want to end up together, and we just never really develop a desire to have sex with that person (or anyone else.) If you found out that you always had crushes on boys and even if it got to the stage where you wanted to marry a boy and you still didn 8767 t want to have sex with him, then you 8767 d be a hetero-romantic asexual. (That 8767 s what I am.)
It 8767 s a little sad, but I 8767 m beginning to wonder if I 8767 d even like kissing. I mean, I love to watch the characters I 8767 m rooting for finally kiss, but I really don 8767 t know if I 8767 d enjoy it myself. Then again, being a demiromantic asexual, I 8767 ve never gotten close enough to someone to get kissed anyhow. I have two very close, very dear friends. But I don 8767 t feel a romantic pull towards either of them.
By making this post, I am not interested in getting into debates about the historical Jesus whether he can be reconstructed in any meaningful or consistent respect, or whether he even existed at all but rather want only to indicate that within the checkered Christian tradition, which has been responsible for preaching universal love while supporting cruelty and oppression through the centuries (and the doctrine and dogma of which lies directly behind much of the lethal imbalance that JMG describes), there have been alternative voices, which pop up here and there, in touch with the wholeness of being human as being part, and only a part, of a creation that is also whole and 8775 good 8776 and thus to be accepted and, yes, embraced in love and gratitude.
Hate is of course a persistent boil that has long plagued our society and stubbornly resists all our efforts to lance it. But deep rage is what’s making it more inflamed than ever before. There is an ongoing drama going on in the small town I live in. Last year a woman entered a local antique shop and spotted a vintage Federal Milling Company ‘Lucky’ flour bag from the early 6955’s that had as its symbol a swastika. This long predated the Nazi era but that didn’t stop the visitor from accosting the owner and accusing her of being a ‘racist’ for displaying the bag. The owner’s attempts to explain its history were futile. Things got heated enough so she ejected the woman who promptly went home and posted a screed on her Facebook account.
This defiently describes me. Especially the 8775 straight default. 8776 I knew I didn 8767 t like guys but at the same time I certainly didn 8767 t like girls. So no gay, lesbian, bi or any other combinations. So I stuck myself with 8775 straight. 8776 I DON 8767 T LIKE ANYONE. I just see people. I don 8767 t see 8775 hot 8776 8775 cute 8776 8775 beautiful 8776 etc. People look 8775 nice 8776 is my word for it. I only used 8775 hot, pretty, sexy 8776 etc. for describing people by DEFINITION. The world see them as that. Not I.
A refusal to have sex with you doesn 8767 t necessarily mean that he 8767 s asexual. Maybe he 8767 s asexual, maybe he 8767 s actually stressed out, maybe he 8767 s gay, maybe he 8767 s got performance anxiety, maybe he doesn 8767 t want children, maybe he thinks sex is 8775 dirty 8776 . The only way to find out what 8767 s going on is to talk to him about it. (Preferably in a non-confrontational manner, outside of the bedroom.)
Finally, a couple of notes on the next month of blogging here. Next Wednesday, August 9, is our monthly book club discussion. The book we’re exploring is Mystery Teachings from the Living Earth , and our theme, not coincidentally, is the discussion of the Law of Wholeness on pp. 68-76. The Wednesday after that, the 66th, will be August’s regular monthly post, and after that on the 78rd comes the August open post.
The same logic gets applies in fields far removed from about the way that people in America think about food, to cite only one example. Every fad diet for the last thirty years has fixated on identifying some specific food or food group as evil incarnate, and insisted that if you amputate it from your diet, why, then you could count on perfect health and whatever body shape happens to be fashionable at the moment. Again, the mere fact that it never works does nothing to keep people from chasing after the next example, because the blind faith that goodness requires amputation is so unquestioned in our time.
I 8767 m a 67 year old male and feel very similar. I also masturbate but I don 8767 t really need to have sex and don 8767 t really have that desire Only female pornography appeals to me though I could go my whole life without sex and I wouldn 8767 t care. I feel as soon as I have a partner I wouldn 8767 t need to masturbate ever again And I won 8767 t have sex either So I 8767 m guessing my masturbation is because I haven 8767 t found a partner suitable for me and though I don 8767 t have a sexual desire for that partner I use it as a means of just forgetting about it in the mean time although, I too am confused :) If you can please read one of my comments a few places below this I need help
Recently I stumbled across this Huxley passage from the book 8766 The Hidden Huxley 8767 , by David Bradshaw. I thought of the discussions here about class, and the hatred toward working class from the middle class (something I experienced virulently during the first half of my life in Ireland one reason why moving to the USA in 98 was a good idea was that I could 8766 pass 8767 , being white, god help us) the Huxley passage dovetails nicely with JMG 8767 s observations of middle class people in the USA in recent years, and their class hatred for those lower than them. Depressing this, as it shows the continuity of this dynamic, seen here by Huxley in 6989.
As a Christian, forgiveness has always been important. However:
How to “make” it work. The question of functionality, of the doing of the thing, has puzzled me from childhood Sunday School (and playground!) experiences. My questions were met with hesitant non-answers, or “well, pray about it.” It took me a long time to realize that meant, they didn’t know either and weren’t about to admit it.
Yes, this does all tie right back into a literal Everest-sized mountain of hypocrisy, a key feature in your essay. But it turns out that this hypocrisy is richly rewarded by social acceptance and inclusion into the 8775 like-me 8776 grouping. For many, exclusion from a group is painful. Only as we mature do we get perspective on the effect exclusion has on others. Only with experience do we learn that inclusion in a group who are terribly similar is both stifling and stilting. With age comes experience and the sharpening of judgement maybe why judgement is anathema to so many?
Another of Scott Alexander 8767 s colleagues, a blogger who goes by the Prussian, wrote a great article on contemporary feminism and its tendency to attack 8775 nice guys 8776 way more viciously than men who are statistically more likely to be actual misogynists. His argument is that a lot of so-called progressives in western societies are really just bullies and bullies will take a soft target over a hard target any day:
I 8767 ve seen a couple of people say that they felt this way before they discovered asexuality. The assumption is that someone has to be straight, gay, or bi, no exceptions, no alternatives. Everyone has to get placed in one of those buckets, there are no other options. Clearly, since they didn 8767 t experience attraction to the same sex, they couldn 8767 t be gay or bi, therefore they had to be straight by default, since that was the only bucket left.
I have the hardest time paying attention, i 8767 ll try to think dirty before going to bed but i think its more effort than i have. I always end up day dreaming about other stuff. And there is no man/woman barriers for me, women bother me because in movies i cant figure out why they wont throw a punch or be calm. Gender roles mean very little to me in personality terms. I love anthropology and tend to even think of love and the desire to mate as a biological function that inhibits day to day life and drive sitcoms. I have some cross overs and can enjoy a good bro-mance or romance or whatever but thinking of me in any context with another person other than emotions puts me off..i dont know.
Reading this post, you could be talking about Buddhist thought. As you know, one of the underlying assumptions in classical Buddhist thought (and one that permeates basically all traditions of Buddhism) is that one can purify the mind of all afflictions and achieve a sort of moral perfection, which is additionally free from all suffering. I used to think this was possible, and a goal worth pursuing, but after around two years in robes with a shaved head in India, I realized that even the most learned practitioners display all the same human feelings, failings and desires. Some have clearly benefited from their practice, and are much more compassionate as a result, but jealousy, ambition and greed are still obviously present. Nowadays I feel that accepting the human condition in all its facets is a lot more realistic and healthier.