Posted: 2017-11-10 21:55
I hate stories like this it makes me want to slap people very, very hard. How stupid are people? The man has his child and is divorced. So, suddenly there 8767 s something wrong with him? Do these parents, okay women, not think about their spouse and what other moms would think of them if they weren 8767 t around? If I knew the parent, I probably wouldn 8767 t have a problem but if it was a parent I didn 8767 t know, I 8767 d spend time getting to know them. This goes for ANY parent, regardless of gender.
Maybe it is also that I have never been in the position of my kid never having been asked to do a sleep over by a kid that I don 8767 t the parents. Which, now that I think of it, in this day and age in our mobile communities, is actually pretty cool. I am pretty sure that in my father 8767 s day as a child, his mother knew every other parent in the community as the school only had a total of 65 kids. So yeah, maybe you are right. It doesn 8767 t matter if I say I want to know them first. Because I already do know them. And if actions say they are not trustworthy, then I operate on that.
I am a divorced Dad of 7 girls, 5 & 9. My 9 year old daughter wants to have a sleepover for her 65th birthday at my house. I have had several of her friends over to my house to play, I 8767 ve taken them out, gone swimming with them & even helped one poor girl who had an accident while out bushwalking. None of the parents seem to have any objection about my involvement, but I have encountered hostility when out with my girls, playing with them & other kids want to join in the game because their own parents are too busy with their smartphones & Facebook to bother. Suddenly I am the enemy because I interact with kids & join in the fun?
I appreciate your comment. I 8767 m sorry if I offended you. This has been MY experience and as far as being negative, I 8767 m willing to accept your view of my being pessimistic. I cannot deny my feelings or my frustrations and I hope you haven 8767 t experienced what I have. I see what I see both in my life, my friends and co-workers and I don 8767 t have much positive to report. More concerning are those who try to be 8775 positive 8776 while being emotional buffers and then convince me otherwise (they won 8767 t even read BR sad but true). I didn 8767 t see your comment until now, so all I can say is don 8767 t read what I write or do offer a counterbalance. I 8767 m open to suggestions. I 8767 m not sure how to couch my experiences 8775 positively. 8776 They are real and spinning it or making light does them a discredit. There are those who agree or at least see my point of view so I can 8767 t be that out to lunch. Please continue watching your fish as I 8767 m trying to relearn how to cast a line. That 8767 s my struggle. I apologize in any respect.
Lastly, I want to also talk about your last thought there when you say 8775 I should just enjoy this feeling even if it does not end the way I want because there are many people in this world that never get to feel this way. 8776 Sounds like another way of putting it would be 8775 I should enjoy this while this lasts because I don 8767 t know when I might get to experience this again 8776 or 8775 there 8767 s only so much of this great feeling to go around 8776 or 8775 there 8767 s only so many great guys out there 8776 so I should 8775 take what I can get. 8776
When I was at the hospital in the ER for 8 days, and he was by my side. The moment I got out of the hospital she invented that the doctor told her she might die. He left me and ran to her. When he find out it was a lie, he came back to me. And all this time I always though it was just the process of they moving on after 75 years together, but for ALL YOU LADIES, if the man runs to her to help. HE STILL IN LOVE WITH HER!!!
He 8767 s having a great time, sex, a shoulder to cry on and she doesn 8767 t raise a squeak about how she 8767 s being treated.
I 8767 ve done it myself in the recent past, put up with crap because I thought I was in love and he would sort out his problems (with my help of course), eventually see me for the wonderful woman I am and we would magically ride off into the sunset, madly in love etc, etc, etc. We know how this fantasy pan 8767 s out in the long run.
I was naive in many respects. I lost my virginity to a friend (not boyfriend) a month before going to NYC because I was convinced if I went to the Big Apple a virgin, I wouldn 8767 t survive. A weird rationale to be sure and a funny one too, but I think I was ready to grow up not necessarily in a hurry, although this has a ring of truth, but I wanted to be free in most respects and yet, womanly and knowledgeable too.
Who is 8775 nuts 8776 Teresa, Tracy or I?-LOL. I hope you aren 8767 t talking about me because I 8767 ve got my head screwed on pretty straight here, I 8767 m just telling her the truth. I know this situation(whether we bring faith/Bible into it or not)is messed up and not good for her. You don 8767 t have to attend church or read to know this is bad, but since she is using that, I too used that in my response as well.
By the time I met Mike, I was starting to wonder if date three might be good enough, even for me. But after our third date, he told me he wanted to wait until we were married. I couldn't have been more shocked but as I got to know him, it made sense. Mike was a Christian, I mean a real Christian: the kind that goes to Mass every Sunday, the kind that fears God, the Little House on the Prairie kind. Plus, he was a supportive friend, so much kinder than anyone I'd ever known. He volunteered at homeless shelters and sang in the church choir. He read all the right books, led several community groups and wanted to teach less fortunate children.
Even AFTER there is a legal divorce, there can still be a 8775 marriage 8776 . My X was separated for 9 years & divorced for 6 year when we meet, BUT he really was still attached to her [very]. And she came around from time to time for whatever [justifiable] reasons. See? Even though it seemed safe, it was not We are middle-aged people: No under-aged children to consider. Still, I eventually felt like the other woman. Really, WHY didn 8767 t they just re-marry? WHY did he bother with me since he felt like he did? To make her jealous? As a pay-back for her infidelity? If 8775 yes 8776 , then it worked. I was used & abused by this.
I don 8767 t at all agree with MR Writer 8767 s conclusions about men, but I DO sense the pain and frustration in her voice, and I hope that we can help her share her views and come to a more positive understanding. This doesn 8767 t come from browbeating or namecalling. It comes from empathy and then a little straight talk, albeit with words 8775 seasoned with salt. 8776 I would be reacting the same way (and have reacted the same way, might I add) to a man on this site expressing misgivings about his experiences with the women in his life, wondering if all women were like this.
The reason I say this is the separated Narcs brother met his now wife when he was newly separated. This woman has 9 children from a previous marriage and the grass did not grow under his feet to get the divorce from his wife finalized to marrying his now wife who had she followed our advice probably wouldn 8767 t have given this man the time of day. So you see, it does happen. It happened right in front of me while I dated the brother who was the typical EUM we write about here. I got unlucky. She got lucky.
Oh, I see what you 8767 re saying, with the kid 8767 s perspective. To tell you the truth, I was also coming from the adult view there. The adults are responsible for seeing that the kids get what they need. Kids will try to accommodate and say they 8767 re fine even when things are pretty bad and they 8767 re not doing so well, partly because they don 8767 t have enough perspective to see what 8767 s good and what 8767 s marginal. But it 8767 s up to the parents to look after what they need, see problems, try to ameliorate, see they grow up well. So while it 8767 s great that you handled your parents 8767 transition fine, I 8767 m sure your mother was overseeing the process, aware of things you weren 8767 t and needs you didn 8767 t know you had.
Disappear unprompted without warning. He cannot know you 8767 re hurt or annoyed by his lack of interest. Don 8767 t text him, call him, nothing. You want to remove attention you 8767 d been giving him previously so he misses it and tries to get it back. You also want to give him time to really think about you and acknowledge your many positive attributes. He can 8767 t do this if you 8767 re constantly giving him something new to think about by texting him all day.
As a dad who kicks serious ass in pretty much every way imaginable, I can assure you that I would probably lose my proverbial shit if I got that phone call.
The baseless accusation that I would even think of doing anything to harm a child is nothing short of insulting, and the fact that this bush league book with their silly little 8775 sitches 8776 plays into such accusations makes it even crappier than I could have imagined.
I have been married to a divorced man for 6 years. He has more contact with his ex wife than with me. He works away 6. Months of the year. He supports her in ways that does not seem normal. He has got furious with me before for asking questions concerning his ex and children. He has lied on several occasions or hidden fact that he sends them for holidays. They have been divorced for 69 years. 8 years ago he bought her a new car. She defrauded a company and he paid. He still received petrol and credit cards in Mrs name on his account. Allot of people have told me I am naive and need to wake up. He always uses an excuse that he does it for kids who by the wAy is not at home. What disturbs me the most is that neither of them have any regard for my existence and she treats him like a piece of dirt. Also I was not aloud to go with when he saw his kids for 7 years until I insisted. Now I sit in the car. My heart is breaking. I lost my first husband and father of my now 66 yr old through heart attack 9 yes ago He thought me to love unconditionally I don 8767 t know how much more I can take. Any advice will be appreciated.
First off, he never said what his plans were earlier in the day the night before. Had he just said, Hey, can we hang another day, I need to unpack I would 8767 ve been more sympathetic. Because I like having the last word I called him. He said he felt like I was 8775 pushing and pressuring 8776 him and that he 8775 didn 8767 t want to feel rushed. 8776 I told him that I didn 8767 t think he was my BF, nor did I think that I was his GF, but when two people first start dating, they just wanna be around each other and explore more of what was there you know that honeymoon phase no need to rush into anything! He backed down and agreed. I told him that he had been saying so much how he missed me and wanted to see me and had no action so I stepped up, then he said that he 8767 s trying to figure out himself, so I said, fine: you go figure out yourself, and I 8767 m going to go and meet someone who wants to be with me.
I am 57 years old, one of four girls. My dad was a great guy, loved kids and even worked at the 8766 Y 8767 camp as a counselor when he was a teenager. He was wonderful to all his grandchildren, even from the time they were babies, holding them, playing with them, etc. (although diaper-changing was not his to-do list.) Nothing saddened me more than to hear him comment that he hesitated to hold other babies or comment about them because he was afraid of being seen as a pervert.
I know your territory very well, too as I know Noquay 8767 s. I 8767 m in NJ, but I 8767 ve been all over the US. You 8767 re in Republican country. And, then you 8767 re artsy and a vegan? They probably look at you as a Martian, as traditional as they are down there. Hahaha! Good luck, Sweetheart. I hope for your sake your possibilities are far better than mine, 8767 cause mine ain 8767 t too good.