Posted: 2017-10-13 14:20
Have you tried calling him? Maybe something came up sometimes you never know what is going on Is he active on any other social media? If so, then he is a player and should not get any more of your attention I would send him a message like 8775 I 8767 m assuming you are dead right now and your spirit is reading all my texts may lord have mercy on your selfish rotting womanizing soul 8776 lol But in all seriousness, don 8767 t text him ever, don 8767 t tweet him, instagram him, whatsapp him, or do anything stupid like reaching out to him ever again, until he contacts you again, believe me it him if you have the strength (I wouldn 8767 t be able to but maybe you are stronger) And when he texts you (Which usually happens within the first to second month of NC which you are strictly going to follow but don 8767 t hold your breath) don 8767 t text him back till 79 hours later make him suffer and be cool when you reply to him like you could not really care less anymore..Anyway by then you won 8767 t really care enough to even reply
He says he loves me. Says he misses me. But now he hardly txts me, tells me what he 8767 s doing or is sweet. We did txt daily kisses and sweet nothings. And now he says he 8767 s been just so tired with everything and is really busy on the run up to xmas he just doesn 8767 t have a lot of time. Time for what??!! Me anymore? Why say he loves me then?! Why doesn 8767 t he do me the courtesy of just explaining where I stand. I need to know. For me..closure is very important to move on with anything like this (because it can make me extremely ill), no matter what the article says. If this wasn 8767 t all that serious, I wouldn 8767 t care as much as I do and I wouldn 8767 t have invited him into my house and meet my daughter. He even assured her he wasn 8767 t going to hurt me. I 8767 m just really angry he doesn 8767 t have the balls to talk to me and clarify things! I need to know so I can heal and find someone who deserves me truly.
I had a similar experience as yours, met a guy on a dating site who lives about 8 hours away. He was chasing me, always initiating contact and finally I agreed to meet in person although I wanted to keep it slow. We got along really well and had a great day together. When he left, he told me how much he liked me and that we absolutely had to meet again if we both have some free time etc We kept texting for the next 7 weeks and I started to talk about another meeting, but I had a very full work schedule, and he said something like, 8775 no need to hurry, I won 8767 t run away from here 8776 I didn 8767 t get the hint. His texting became less frequent and when I started another attempt and made a suggestion for a meeting, he answered, 8775 I 8767 m not sure about that weekend, probably my friend and I are planning to do something 8776 . And that was the last thing I heard from him. I reached out to him twice, but no reaction. I know I mustn 8767 t take it personally, but still it hurts because I feel like he didn 8767 t really mean it when he told me what a great girl I am 🙁
I had the same exact thing happen to me. We 8767 re talking for a really long time through text and then we met up and had a really good time I thought. Kissed good bye and then he was really bad at answering my texts after that. At first I thought it was just he was busy. But then he did something annoying, deleted me on Facebook and blocked me?! Childish, clearly he wasn 8767 t interested so I sent him a text have a nice life. He never answered. BUT he still checks in on my snapchat all the time?! Wtf, go away and leave me in peace.
A guy did this to me once, after a few weeks of seeing each other. Then 8 months later he popped up in a text message telling me: 8776 i don 8767 t know why we stop talking to each other, i really don 8767 t know why, do you? 8776 UGh!! he reappeared with an excuse, after i tried to reach out to him on several occasions when he initially started to pull away but was he nice enough to reply to my text back then..NO! I gave him the same treatment he showed me by not replying to his message and disappearing on him without a will never hear from me again. His loss..
so he texted me to know how was my day. We exchanged message for a while until i almost mentioned our plan that HE MADE for the weekend. and no news nothing just disappeared.
i wait with days and text him, he just said he was busy he is sorry and hope i am well. and now he is in america for 7 weeks.
i just wanted to believe yes he just got a new job and he is really busy but all of those articles i guess i just have to face the truth
I have recently been 8775 ghosted 8776 for the third time I gotta say, it sucks!
This time around it wasn 8767 t a slow fade out like before.
It was an overnight change, literally. We were talking and our conversation was fun and happy and then, because he works nights, we said goodbye. Then right before he went into work he sent me a heart symbol through text ( 8) and it made me happy.
The next day, I didn t hear from him. I waited a couple days thinking he d contact me eventually but he didn t. So I texted him. I got friendly replies but obviously something had changed.. and then eventually he just didn t respond and I haven t heard from him since.
I am so confused about how things could be so happy one day and so distant the next. I refuse to text him again though because of my pride which just leaves me sitting around, wondering if he ll come back or if I lost him forever.
I know the smartest move would be to accept the fact that he pulled a Houdini act and move on but it s easier said than done..
Funny how dissapearance happens very often during the xmas had similar not hear a word from him for a week and then he responded to me that he wanted a peaceful xmas without a I was worried that something might have happenend to a person.
So everything changed for me also
If he was such a dick and could not write a word to me i figured this is not a person i could trust. And also I understood that he is definatley not into me.
Another new experience.
Thank you for sharing!
From listening to/reading about the experiences of guys who have ghosted, I agree with Jools in that the reasons for disappearing are not always strictly limited to them losing interest. Sometimes, it can be just testing your interest level, if they have reason to believe you may not be that into them. There are other reasons as well, which they may not wish to confront you with. A friend of mine had a guy ghost on her because he 8767 s heard (wrongly) she had cheated on him! The difficulty very often in these cases (which compounds the process) is that most women (myself included at one time) automatically assume he 8767 s vanished because he isn 8767 t or has lost interested, so 8766 react 8767 accordingly, which often only serves in turn to strengthen his original point of view.
Wow! I am so glad I have found you. I have started dating again and these are the exact things I have been dealing with. Of course I feel like it 8767 s all me and that I have done something wrong. I dated this guy a few times and I thought we had hit it off then he just disappears. I have blocked him from all social media just so I don 8767 t check up on him. I feel so much better after reading what you have said. I am taking this as a learning experience so that when the right does come along I will be confidant and not full of stress and worry.
I don 8767 t know if my statement is scientific law, but it 8767 s pretty accurate. You 8767 re obviously not a loser, but it 8767 s not like you don 8767 t have baggage. No offense, but two kids is baggage from a single guy 8767 s perspective. Right or wrong, single moms have a difficult time on the dating scene. Single men view the family dynamic quite negatively, unless they already have kids themselves. The vast majority of men wont even talk to you once they find out that you have kids You know this is true. It sucks, i know. But to be fair, you must see it from their perspective too. Dating single moms, from an eligible bachelor 8767 s perspective, is an entirely different topic and can of worms. I 8767 m not going to blab on and on about it But I can say, with a reasonable level of confidence, that it was likely a major factor in his decision to ghost you.
Anyway, because of that, whenever I got close to a woman my terrible self esteem would sabotage me and i 8767 d play games. They wern 8767 t even conscious games really but more on a sub-conscious level. I 8767 d be getting along with her really well but something would trigger my self doubt so out of the blue almost as a test i guess, I would just disappear on her or ghost her and not reply to her txts or calls, etc.
Went on five dates with a guy and really was into him. I felt an immediate spark when we met and he asked me out soon after that. Well after the last time (a really great date that lasted for hours and had some really amazing kissing/making out), he has gone poof. We were in touch a bit after that but it was me initiating and I invited me to hang, he said he was out of town, then I reached out again one more time and he, for the first time ever, did not respond to me at all. It 8767 s been weeks since then and I 8767 ve not heard from him neither have I reached out. And I won 8767 t. Because I am not into chasing people. It does suck though, I admit, because I thought he liked me and I was really taken with him.
oh the disappearing act. how pathetic someone is to do this to another human being, not once, but three times! fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me..
he has disappeared 8 times. unfortunately i do know that he is alive so it was not because he dropped dead that he disappeared. after the first time i completely lost myself. not because i was in love with him, but because i truly could not believe that someone could do that to another human being. that someone in his field of work could be so cowardly to just simply say, i am not into this any more. it took a while to get myself back after that first disappearance but i did. the second and third time made me feel ALMOST sad for him. clearly this man, this thing that someone must have raised in a jungle with no morals or respect for others, has some serious issues to be able to treat someone with such disrespect and in such a hurtful & careless way. i no longer blame myself but that took a while. i now know 655% that it was always HIS issue and never mine. i will never reach out to him again & i hope he never reaches out to me again either.
My boyfriend of 5 years did this to me several times! Then whenever i get over it and get my life back on track he comes back and manages to destroy it again. He is currently in the 8775 ignoring 8776 period again. I guess in his case its not ghosting but it became plain emotional abuse, as he has known me for so long and still manages to hurt me on purpose when disappearing. Any advice on how to handle this?
I am glad to see all theses responses even though it 8767 s painful for everyone. My husband passed about 5 months ago and I just started dating again in the last month. He was sick for years. Anyway first guy told me he loved me, then jetted. After borrowing money of course. 7nd guy was a long distance phone and we just set a weekend for him to visit and then I haven 8767 t heard. Man, I really miss my husband! I never even heard of this 65 years ago. I 8767 m thankful to have a different outlook though after your stories.
I just very recently had a guy do the fade out on me in fact he is still doing it and it hurts like hell We chat and he is very loving and then disappears on me for 8 to 9 days. It hurts like hell and i do not know what to do. The off days,( especially the weekends where there is no contact at all anymore), are depressing as hell and the days we are in contact are heavenly, So today was an on day. but I was feeling so emotionally exhausted, and tired I decided to call him out on it..humorously of course since confrontation is not my strongest point.
What does that mean? It means there are a lot of women out there looking for a 8775 lack of red flags 8776 rather than a REAL connection or real reason to fall in love. Simply having a man around who is loyal and considerate might be enough for you- but those two qualities are shared by thousands and thousands of interchangeable men, and putting them on a pedestal for it won 8767 t make them feel special- just generic. (she 8767 s not interested in ME she doesn 8767 t care to learn anything about me, she 8767 s only interested because i showed up, and because i happen to be a good man).
Dear girls, the best way to not be hurted by guys is to NOT EXPECT. Then you just won 8767 t care if this guy you have been dating disappears. You 8767 ll be like 8775 ugh, okay, next 8776 . The problem is when we meet a guy and we start to like him we fantasize about him too much. Be more simple. If a guy disappears then okay, be glad you can keep searching for a better one ) theres so many good looking and interesting guys to meet!
I am entering this comment under an alias just to be careful and avoid the guy i am writing this about from seeing it. I as well met a man on tinder. He was very straight forward and i liked that about him. He never hid his interest in seeing me as soon as he could. We ended up meeting and pretty soon a pattern developed. We would meet, hook up, and then go our separate ways. I am a virgin so this was all new territory for me. I would 8767 ve never gone along with that had I not thought this dude was something else. but I 8767 m really not into games or being passive aggressive, so I called him out on it. On the not texting me until he was ready to see me, on the just flat out ignoring the texts I would send him. His response?
8775 Just be a good girl. Do you wanna keep doing what we are doing? 8776
Dropped the guy as fast as i could. Basically, even when you do get the 8775 closure 8776 , or just A answer, it almost always leaves you feeling as confused as if he had just vanished and never said why.