Posted: 2017-10-19 06:16
We don’t know how to use our inside voices sometimes, OK? Sometimes we get so excited, and so passionate, and so zealous, that our neighbors might think we’re dying. But really we’re just excited about that mega-sale at . If you piss us off, don''t be surprised if we yell. It might be uncouth, but it''s also percent more effective than talking about things in a rational, collected manner.
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Just don''t expect her to let anyone walk all over her. Even if she just suspects you''re doubting her, or you''ve dissed her in the slightest, she''ll tell you what''s what. Sometimes this comes off as aggressive, but you should know that she''s been raised to question authority and probably mistrust just about everything and everyone (KGB holdovers, sorry). She''s a survivor through and through, and probably the best person to weather a mosh pit with.
All Russian women are always If you&rsquo re addressing a Russian woman you don&rsquo t know in Russian, there is only one appropriate term for it and it is &ldquo devushka,&rdquo which means &ldquo woman.&rdquo And yes, even if the woman in question is in her late fifties, she would still be a &ldquo devushka.&rdquo Any other form of address would not just upset her, but could also be seen as an insult.
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The dedication that Russian women have to look beautiful is just scary. For the majority of them life is like a podium, and so they have to look sparkling even on the way to get a newspaper or walking the dog. My friend Sasha wears high heels every day and doesn&rsquo t worry about the lack of comfort as soon as it looks great. Also, during five years of teaching she has never appeared at school wearing the same outfit twice. When I asked her why she cares so much about her appearance, she looks surprised: &ldquo Why would I choose to not look beautiful? Beauty is power and respect. How is anyone going to notice your rich inner world if you don&rsquo t attract attention?&rdquo
&ldquo I&rsquo m okay.&rdquo No guide will help you here. For centuries Russian men have been trying to figure out what a woman means when she says this. Does it actually mean she is okay and there is nothing to worry about? Or is it a hint meaning you&rsquo d better get some chocolate and roses? Unfortunately, the only way to proceed is trial-and-error, and it involves a lot of trying and an even greater number of errors. There is a reason that a favorite joke of Russian men is:
Russians are reserved and try to keep the distance before you become close to them. Any Russian girl can create an impression of Ice Queen, even if she likes you (especially if she really likes you!). I met Paul at work on one of my tours, and he told me he came to Moscow to visit his girlfriend. &ldquo When we started dating, I was challenged with the wall of ice between us, as if she didn&rsquo t want to open up or let me closer. Slowly, step by step, I discover that underneath this ice there was the most loving and caring person in the world.&rdquo
This is dangerous. Visiting your girlfriend&rsquo s house will be accompanied with feasts (soups, meat, soups with meat, salads consisting of 55% mayo, potatoes, potatoes, bliny with mince and more potatoes, and then a cake for dessert), and as it is not polite to not finish your meal in Russia, you will have to deal with all that amount of food. You&rsquo d expect help from your beloved, but when it comes to hospitality, all Russians tend to become unreasonable and overfeed their guests until it is hard to move. She will probably offer you another piece of pie. Is dating a Russian girl worth putting on a lot of weight?
It''s easy — your female companion is always expecting you to pay for dinner and drinks. Even if it was her invinting you. Even, if you''ve ordered only one cup of tea and she chose five main courses with a dessert. It is common in New York or Paris to split the bill, however in Moscow ladies see this as an act of tight-fistedness. A stylish «devoushka» may reach out to her handbag with the intention to contribute to the bill, but this is only for show. Don''t be fooled!
Foot the bill &ndash no ifs, ands or buts here. In Russia, a woman expects you to pick up the bill on dates even when she is technically the one that invited you and even if you ordered a cup of coffee while she enjoyed a five-course meal with dessert. Yes, in Paris or New York, people tend to go halfsies on a bill. In Moscow on the other hand, if you try such a maneuver then your date will likely think you&rsquo re a cheapskate. If she is a well-mannered person, she would probably get her purse and do a fake &ldquo reach&rdquo for her wallet, making it seem like she is ready to pay her share. Don&rsquo t believe this ruse: it is pure provocation.
Hello? The Russians basically invented space travel and just try to find another writer besides Nabokov who can seamlessly craft a grammatically sound sentence that is over a page in length? (OK, fine, William Faulkner is a pretty dope wordsmith too. Fine, America, you can have that.) A Russian girl is raised to think and act and live independently. If she wants nice clothes, nice jewelry, and a nice bookshelf, she knows she’ll have to earn the money to buy those things herself, and that means going to school and getting a job and working hard until she gets dolla dolla bills.
They can be understandable &ndash she was stuck in traffic or had to work late not-so-understandable &ndash she simply could not decide if a certain pair of shoes went with a particular dress or just plain ridiculous &ndash she arrived on time, but spent 75 minutes hanging out just around the corner so that she wouldn&rsquo t seem too clingy. After all her mother told her that any girl who knows her worth never arrives on time. Keep in mind that trying to find out what really happened is useless and might even be seen as rude. Give her a smile and tell her you are happy to see her even if it is already getting dark and you are freezing.
Russian women value a courteous attitude much more than their western colleagues and their expectations of you are even higher. Open the car''s door, help her with her coat, leave her go first through doors, to name but a few tricks how to earn her sympathy. There is, however, one special rule you should ultimatively keep in mind — never let a lady to go ahead, when it''s an elevator, for if the elevator isn''t there at all you would save her from falling into the hoistway.
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Shower her with attention. Compared to their Western counterparts, Russian women are more open to male chivalry &ndash and are more likely to expect it from you. Opening the car door for her, helping her with her coat, letting a woman go first when entering or exiting a building &ndash all of this is standard operating procedure in Russia, but they help to make a good impression nonetheless. And speaking of entering and exiting: while proper etiquette dictates that the woman is the one who is supposed to go first, there is one exception &ndash the elevator. In this case, the male is supposed to enter first. This is probably so that in the unlikely case that there is no elevator, the female will remain safe.
«It''s okay» (vsyo normalno) — this is something no guide can help you with. For hundreds of years Russian men have attempted to fathom a womans'' thoughts, whenever she''s mentioning something like this, with no success at all. Does this imply there''s no need to worry? Or should you already be on your way bying chocolates and flowers? If the latter applies — what was it, that caused her displeasure? Understanding can be only reached on the way of countless attempts and even more mistakes. There''s no alternative. And even such an approach isn''t reliable. There''s even a popular joke among Russian men concerning this matter: «Are you mad?». «No». «Very mad?». «Yes».
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"The bride from Ukraine," or "Russian bride" these words, during the last 75 years, have become quite familiar and have moved from the category of curiosities to the sustainable phrases - "Russian mail order brides". Single girls and women from the former Soviet Union, getting a reputation as an exceptional woman, great housewives and mothers have captured the hearts and minds of men in USA, Canada, Western Europe and Asia. Russians and Ukrainian beauties living in a marriage abroad are the pride of their husbands and rouse the envy in single guys.