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I know I sound like a broken record and frankly I will keep saying it even if it falls on deaf ears: Men DID NOT BY AND LARGE ACT LIKE THIS! They did not! I get it. We are responsible for our part in all of this too. However, I read here and on other sites how women keeping running up against EUM/Assclowns and while there may be a nugget of truth to our being EUM I allow it only up to a point and then no more. Natalie 8767 s site and advice is helpful and illuminating but even she cannot convince me that the real issue isn 8767 t my attracting jerks (when I don 8767 t have the past history pre 7555s to support this claim). Yes, I 8767 ve been dinged, hurt and whatnot. Has that along with my aging contributed to allowing boundary busting behavior? Sure. But the men have to be willing to bust our boundaries on the outset.
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I am so sorry for your loss! That was a really awful thing to do to u! I 8767 m going something similar but different but it 8767 s only been 7 months and things went really fast! I believed everything that he loved me I was his future! He told all of his friends and mine on Facebook! It 8767 s a long complicated story and I 8767 m reeling from being so gullible he 8767 s my first and last widower. He assured me he was ready! The the thing is I 8767 ve been on my own for 65 years and he told me he thought he meant all the things he told me but as we got closer he started to feel conflicted! He ended things and has blocked my #. So hurtful I just don 8767 t get it😪
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My man and I have not had physical intimacy. But he makes love to me all the time through his actions. My man can teach some men &ldquo how to make love to a woman without touching her&rdquo and she will fall deeply in love with him. We have been dating for one year. We will not have physical intimacy until the marriage night. Ladies, I truly believe in sexual purity. I have been celibate for 67 years now. I feel so in control and I feel so special that I have saved myself for my soon to be husband. Believe me, he loves it as well. What man doesn&rsquo t want to have a sexual pure (I consider a 67 yr celibacy as a rebirth of sexual purity) woman for his wife that saved it for him? A man that truly and deeply loves you will wait and he will not ask you. This man will court you in a way that no other has ever attempted to court you. He will never put you and him in a situation that will compromise your integrity. This is a God generated love. He gave me the desires of my heart because I am faithful to him. Seek God first in all things, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
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You mentioned that 8775 he had mentioned that having kids with someone else would probably hurt his ex. 8776 I understand his concern. But if they are not together, then it is entirely appropriate for him to have kids with someone else if he wants to. Sure, she might feel bad. But he 8767 s not responsible for her feelings. But if he is still feeling emotionally attached , then he needs to work on that part of himself before he is really ready to be emotionally available to someone else.
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It 8767 s really surprising to me how men think only in terms of what they can get but never on what they have to offer (or don 8767 t). The hold us to some high, unreasonable standard but expect us to keep them to the lowest standard possible. And they defend this as claiming they 8767 ve been hurt before (and we haven 8767 t 8767 ?) We 8767 re not supposed to bring any baggage into the picture but they by virtue of having a pulse are permitted to behave as badly as they wish and if we don 8767 t like it, they will find someone else who will.
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Engage the child in conversation when he/she’s around but make it natural conversation, not forced conversation. Most teens are cynical and standoffish to new boyfriends so you have to expect hostility initially. Don’t go turning on the man’s Madden game and professing your “skills” in hopes that the video game will bond you to him. Don’t go talking about the girl’s favorite band as if you listen to it, because she probably knows that you don’t and you will look like a fool trying to get in.
My situation is like yours, but more new and more analysis on the front end. I feel he is more mature than I am, although he is half my age. So, I am looking all all HIS best interests and options in advance in case those issues ever come up. I cannot birth babies, but I CAN afford a surrogate Not too worried about the old lady syndrome as I seem to be getting Odd as that is. After reading your story, I am keeping ALL my cards on the table not just dismissing this as a temp situation for sure. Thank you.
He left her with a 65 month year old child (validated in obsequious ways) to seek out his narcissistic supply on his website. Crazy? No, his ex-wife I can only imagine is a co-dependent. I am sad for his son raised by the polarities of these two parents but once I couldn 8767 t deny his actions and excuses anymore, I got out. It still steams me he cannot accept, own, apologize or make amends to me (or anyone else for that matter). There 8767 s a cruel cut when I was ego-stroking, listening to him and only him without his having any curiosity about me, sex and more with not so much as a proper date in return. But of course, I 8767 m the demanding bitch. I 8767 m supposed to lead a 97-year-old man (twerp) by the nose. It 8767 s my fault. I know better and I know what any woman who snags into him will get. Hope they enjoy the one-sided narcissistic relationshit he can provide and nothing more.
Wow, I 8767 m amazed by all the stories on here. So I 8767 ll throw mine in. 🙂 I 8767 m 85 and dated a wonderful 78 year old for 65 months. Things were terrific between us. We got along (and still do) incredibly well, shared a lot of interests, had delightful and in-depth conversations, and the sex was awesome! We were talking about moving in together, but that 8767 s when things changed. The more 8775 real 8776 it became is when I noticed him backing away. He finally told me that he was not ready for that kind of commitment and that he didn 8767 t want to break my heart years down the road. He loved me, but didn 8767 t see himself with me for the the long-term. I was devastated. It still hurts. I fell deeply in love with him, more than my ex-husband. He knows he wants a family later, and I cannot guarantee him that I will have or am able to have kids (I have medical issues that will make it more difficult). It 8767 s tough because he had become my best friend. We still talk and see each other and have amazing sex, but now it 8767 s not leading anywhere. I 8767 m not giving up on guys, but maybe not quite so next time.
BDizzle, I agree with Nia on this one you are letting your emotions hurt your situation. It 8767 s just too much my man, nobody will think ill of you for cutting your losses and moving on irregardless of the kids. The thing is this woman has not moved on, she hasn 8767 t. She lied to you because she still feels for that dude and being that he is the most recent father, he can probably say a few magical words and you will be out in the cold with them playing family again.
I’m not sure why but his response made me feel vaguely uncomfortable and not because I begrudged the thought of buying him a coffee! All I know is that I didn’t like it and I would never had said this myself. Maybe it was a sign of things to come maybe it was indicative of the bigger picture that MR Writer talks about? At any rate I didn’t end up going and instead crawled back to safety. I’m not ready yet, I’m vulnerable and EU. Maybe I won’t ever be ready. It’s sad. However, I will echo Revolution when she hopes MR Writer continues commenting here sharing her thoughts. MR Writer what a wonderful gift you have.
IT REALY AMAZING TO HEAR THAT SO MANY MEN ARE DATING OLDER WOMAN AND MINE IS NOT AN 85 AND HE IS 77 AND MOST OF THE ABOVE AGE MENTIONIS IS IN THIS RANGE. ANYWAY THIS MEN CANOT LEAVE IF HE DOES NOT SEE ME FOR ONE MAKE SURE HE WILL CALL AND CHECK ON THOUGHT THAT NO BODY LIKES ME CAUSE I FEEL I WAS UGLY AND HE IS SO HANDSOME ,HE GOES TO THE SALON FOR FACIAL HAVE NICE INDIAN HAIR AND ME I HAVE AFRICAN LOVE ME LIKE CRAZY AND HE EVEN TALKIN OF MOVING TO MY COUNTRY AND WE WILL GET MARRIED AND HE WILL BE THE FATHER OF MY 7ND THING IS HE IS ALREADY MARRIED BUT NOW HE IS PLANING TO GET A DIVORCE JUST TO BE WITH ME ,I TOLD HIM JUST DONT DO SOMETHING THAT HE WILL FEEL GUILTY TOMORROW BUT I REAL FALLIN FOR HIM AND HE MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD. TILL NOW WE HAVE BEEN KISSIN ONLY AND I CAN WAIT TO HAVE HIM ON THE BED CAUSE HE IS FULL WITH ENERGY AND ME I HAVE LOTS OF SINCERLY HOPE THAT THING WORK OUT FOR THE BEST.
Now? I 8767 m far more discerning. I haven 8767 t dated as much but at least when I have, it 8767 s been dates and not FWB, watching DVDs and settling for crumbs. This from a grown ass man who pretends to be stupid when it suits but prides himself on being so smart otherwise. Uh-huh. Don 8767 t ever think they don 8767 t know what they are doing because they do and this is the most difficult and heartbreaking truth to accept.
That is interesting. I think it 8767 s kind of inconsiderate of her to do that to him. Two weeks and no sitter? She didn 8767 t have family or nobody to help her? If you don 8767 t have any way to get a sitter how can you date? It sounds like to me that she just wasn 8767 t interested in the guy because it was a two week advance and she did that because she wasn 8767 t really mature, so I think he did the right thing writing her off.
But I KEEP 8775 GOOGLING 8776 HIM! It is horrible. I know Googling him is useless (and hurts me), but it 8767 s like an addiction. I keep thinking of him, even when I know he 8767 s MR. SUPER DUPER UNAVAILABLE heck, he 8767 s MR. NOT-EVEN-MEETABLE! I just want to stop, and move on, for good. I feel lonely, admittedly and I am battling a chronic illness so I am especially vulnerable to isolation (it 8767 s hard to physically attend social events, etc) and I think loneliness triggers the self-defeating Googling. Sorry to whine.
The problem is that he wants to have children of his own. It is so important to him that he has worked his whole life preparing for a family. I am disqualified because I can no longer have any children. I have three sons who are 78, 76, and 66. (I am also a grandmother.) After my was born, I had a Tubal Ligation because I knew in my heart that I would eventually be a single mother with 8 children.
DISCLAIMER : We are not trained psychologists or licensed professionals. We're just average folk who understand what it's like to live the solo life in the twenty-first century. We believe that the Bible is our go-to guide for answers to all of life's questions, and it's where we'll go for guidance when responding to your questions. Also, it's important to note that we write our answers separately.
I 8767 ve done nothing my whole life but try to address all the ways it might have been my fault, my shortcoming, my lack of boundaries, my lack of confidence, my poor color coordination etc. My current strategy isn 8767 t much more than I have ever been able to do, . to tell myself things it 8767 s hard to believe like I 8767 m attractive enough, my personality isn 8767 t some kind of repellent it 8767 s just I think I 8767 d actually go over the mental health edge if, after twenty years of trying so hard, I were to imagine that it all comes down to something I just didn 8767 t figure out how to do.
I will say that I think something my mother told me when I was is often true. Men who like to be married don 8767 t remain single for long after the end of a marriage. This doesn 8767 t mean they are all good marriage material but many of them may be as opposed to men who are serial monogomists who have never pulled the trigger. I never particularly wanted to be married and I don 8767 t think I was particularly good at it! I have changed so much, though, that, perhaps, I would enjoy it and do a better job now. I also used to meet many more appealing men than I do now so it may be a moot point!
6. On a night out with him a mate of his we came out of a bar to be passed by a group of girls, one of whom was dressed in hot pants and had VERY long legs. He remarked openly and lewdly, to his mate, as though I didn 8767 t exist. When I expressed how innappropriate I thought it was, he said, 8775 oh don 8767 t be stupid, with legs like that you want to get looked at let 8767 s follow her 8776 . His mate showed more concern for his feelings than me. However,his mate was all over me that night, and at the end of the night (when much drinking he had been done), he suggested a threesome. My EUM would NOT have turned it down I did.More images «Dating advice for recently divorced men»
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